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| FORUM . . . . . . | F1 |
| WEATHER . . . . | W1 |
| Jeremy Smithson Arrested - DUI
Los Angeles, CA – Late Sunday night an LAPD officer, pulled over a car that was swerving along the road barely missing several light poles. |
| Jeremy Smithson Arrested - DUI | [X]
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Los Angeles, CA – Late Sunday night an LAPD officer, pulled over a car that was swerving along the road barely missing several light poles. |
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| Central Texas “Still Boring”
SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE OF, TX – On Tuesday, National Geographic announced its finished report on the current state of Central Texas. In an exclusive story, we document the trials that the creators of the report had to go through to bring this presentation to you. |
| Search-drobe Malfunction
Redmond, WA – Microsoft recently gave into the FCC and will soon be updating their new Live.com website. |
| Mass Murder in England
LONDON, England – A popular pub in the London Area bore witness to horrendous acts of homicide last Tuesday. Thirty-six have been confirmed dead, with even more wounded. Constables in the area are baffled. |
| Question: | Dear Quackor, My cat is dying, what do I do? |
| Answer: | Ah. The death of a pet. The most memorable and cherished of my
childhood memories. If you're asking for advice on what to do with the animal, I have but one good suggestion. Read More» |
Ask Quackor for Advice. |
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| City, State: | High / Low: | |
| Detriot, MI | 71 / 70 |
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| Charlotte, NC | 11 / -7 |
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| Houston, TX | 22 / -4 |
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| Bush Accidentally “Cup-Checks” Chinese Ambassador |
| WASHINGTON, D.C. – A furious rush of shouts and screams was heard yesterday, as the Chinese Ambassador suffered a wound to his lower extremity. The (undisclosed) area was filled with security personnel and secret service in an instant. Read More» |
| Things Environmentalists Do On Earth Day |
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| 39% | Sow a limb back on a tree |
| 22% | Walk because Hybrid cars and their gas cost too much |
| 21% | Eat Meat (even vegetarians) |
| 13% | Forget about the whales for once! |
| 5% | Kiss a rosebush |
| Lady Defending Herself With Maiz Charged With Battery |
| Red Sea Can’t Part, Instead Does Comb-Over |
| Canada Sucks! |
| Miracle Weight Loss Program Kills Thousands in Zimbabwe |
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